well the concert was on sunday. was kind of disappointed because the xx didnt sound too good. i had to discover there and then that their keyboardist had left the band. but their guy doing the beats was insane. he was doing beats with one hand and the synth with the other. they sound more clubber-ish live.

florence + and machine on the other hand.... they were GREAT. i just love florence's voice and her wailing(it sounds really good). damn she can sing. she is worthy of being called a siren. it was a pity that the audience was so... dead. the people that rushed to the front didnt even jump or move during the songs. they just... stood there. even florence tried to get the crowd dancing by telling us to jump up and down continuously when she said go. anyway, her dress was really nice. and she was quite funny sometimes. she would flail about and swing left and right.

they saved rabbit heart for last! which was really sweet. (this is a gift, it comes with a price) oh, they also sang hospital beds (cover of the Cold War Kids) and it i like it better than the original. after the concert i bought the tee with the rabbit heart single cover out (the one with her carrying a rabbit). one more thing, do not trust the review of the concert in the ST. there was no way her voice was "grating". maybe to the writer, because he had super hearing or something.

all in all, the concert was good. florence + the machine are working on their new album! cant wait.



oh man she's so funny.

just finished watching season 2 of the oc. they actually played twenty two fourteen by the album leaf again in the season finale!

just watching the ending moments of the episode brought back good memories. not that i wanted trey to die, of course. the way he looked at marissa before he collapsed and died... i just watched the scene like another 5 times. i sound insane right now but fellow oc watchers, you get me. at least i hope you all do. if not maybe im just crazy.

when he got shot, with hide and seek playing in the background... ah good times. i can somehow remember that moment in the oc so well, even years after watching it. i always remembered that scene, where he got shot, and they showed him bleed out the front. somehow it was burned into my brain with together with imogen heap's song. they are linked eternally.

that scene was just.... powerful.

almost done re-watching season 2 of the o.c.

brings back memories of all the great music discovered back in secondary school... like the killers, death cab and rachael yamagata. it's also a nice surprise to find that some of the music i discovered later on was actually featured on the o.c.! like youth group (i think the song was shadowlands) and the album leaf! of all places to hear the album leaf, the last place i would expect was to be in an episode of the o.c... and what a coincidence, the track played on the show was my favourite track.

speaking of coincidences, my trusty ipod and music (they are like sidekicks, fighting crime and saving the world one song at a time) have "helped" me sometimes... recently, i was driving past the huge block of empty land at commonwealth (the one with 9847914 cranes lined up) and i was thinking if i were to take a picture of it and name it.... i would name it something that had the word graveyard in it... to signify the death of greenery and stuff to make way for buildings. at that same moment, the lyrics of the song i was listening to on my ipod went "..... urban sprawl". i was taken aback, then i just marveled at the impeccable timing. thank you julian casablancas, thank you.

my last paragraph probably makes me sound like i'm going insane but then again... i wouldn't expect many people to get what i'm trying to get at. you know what i mean?

i am old. i just finished typing my first CV ever.

what is wrong with this picture?

"she's crazy cakes!" hahaha

oh man I love greys and private practice.

within these four walls
only a number exists which does not progress
which slowly will wish more and more for death
but suddenly my conscience awakes
and i see this tide with no heartbeat
only the pounce of machines
and the military showing their midwives' faces full of sweetness
how much humanity exposed to hunger, cold, panic, pain, moral pressures, terror and insanity.
what horror the face of fascism creates
they carry out their plans with knife-like precision
for them, blood equals medals
slaughter is an act of heroism
how hard it is to sing, when i must sing of horror
horror which i have living
horror which i have dying
to see myself behind so much, and so many moments of infinity
it would silence the screams of the end of my song.

(silence dissolves all objects. it is not related to any counterpart which belongs to the mind. silence has nothing to do with the mind. it cannot be defined. but it can be felt directly, because it is our nearness. silence is restriction. it is feeling without a feeler. silence needs no intermediary. sound which comes from silence, is music.)

"I stopped racing years ago
I stopped listening - I stopped speaking
The world has kept you on your toes
Speak to me with your hands
I've got my friends safe in a cocoon
But I've read enough to know it will end
Kerosene is my last defence
Against all the rules I've bent

I'm in the dark here, I'm in the basement
That's where I keep them, that's where they're buzzing
Last year was a good year, I beat myself to a bloody mess
But blue is the colour of the days I'm hoping for
What have you done to the mind you had
Out there somewhere is the finish line."

Finish Line by Fanfarlo

a little easter egg i found in a small town in New Zealand.

damn, i want to travel so badly.

heart skipped a beat, and when I caught it you were out of reach.

(Don't spend your life alone, who cares who's around anyhow?)

You mean that much to me and it's hard to show
Gets hectic inside of me, when you go
Can I confess these things to you? Well, I don't know
Embedded in my chest and it hurts to hold

I couldn't spill my heart.....

(Can I give it up to you?)

just now i overheard some small kid in my block shouting "TURN ON ON THE LIGHT". moments later, a woman i assume to be the mother of the kid scolds, "DO YOU LIKE IT WHEN PEOPLE SWITCH OFF THE LIGHT WHEN YOU ARE BATHING???" hahahaha holyshit i laughed so hard. the boy's sibling must have switched off the light while he was in the toilet. but come on, who hasn't done this to your siblings before? it's freaking hilarious to flick the switch and hear your brother/sister shout "OEI" or sth along those lines. hahahaha.

oh, that Dr Hauschka shampoo in the picture is so nice. best shampoo i've used in my entire life. except it doesn't belong to me. my mum uses it. i use the Aesop gentle scalp cleansing shampoo on the far right. next to it is the Dr Bronner soap... the peppermint one is so nice. leaves your skin feeling so cool after the water runs off.

oh well there is nothing much for me the blog about so i'm going off. need to do more work. 1 more week to As. it's really here.

20 more days to 90% freedom. (bio mcq on the 3rd. pshh.)

i feel like i can't see the end point clearly. what does all this studying amount to? it all feels so surreal.
i would probably describe myself as disillusioned right now.

sometimes i think about As and it seems insurmountable. other times i think abt As and i feel confident. which one is which?

i guess i probably have to stop looking at the first week of papers as a whole, i should look at the individual papers and think about that, instead of treating it all as one gargantuan mass.

i was bored. decided to film a short one. hopefully after As i can make a better, full length video.
i think only a handful of people know this.... hobby. of sorts.

Math
rijc prelim 09 p2
rijc prelim 09 p1
yjc prelim 09 p1 (all yj students must be freaking math geniuses. either that or their whole cohort failed math)
yjc prelim 09 p2
tpjc prelim 09 p1
ajc prelim 09 p1
ajc prelim 09 p2
cjc prelim 09 p2 (did it already but can't find it.)
njc prelim 09 p2
mjc prelim 09 p1

Chem
cjc prelim 09 p2
sajc prelim 09 p2
sajc prelim 09 p3
cjc prelim 09 p3
njc prelim 09 p2
njc prelim 09 p3
ajc prelim 09 p3
vjc prelim 09 p3 (i thought this paper was quite do-able, until i marked my answers.)

ha. ha. ha. fuck.

i was just trying to google the three gorges dam for my resource file and i typed "three gorges damn" into the search box. my brain is dying on me.

currently, everything feels so surreal.

i can't even think of things to blog about.

swim team! not everyone was inside though.

i have no idea why when i uploaded the black and white pictures to fb all the photos looked whitewashed.

i should really be sleeping right now.

so school ended two days ago, with the baccalaureate service.

i feel that i have changed so much. i probably cannot recognise the me at the start of j1 right now. i have made so many friends, shared so many good (and bad) times with those around me....

i really hope that my friends will keep in contact with me. i will try my part, but at the end of the day it all boils down to the willingness of both parties. i sincerely pray that there will be many many more good years with my friends by my side, sharing laughs and just having adventures with them.

sometimes i wish i could turn back the clock and go back to the times when i did something bad to someone. but the deed is already done. i can't change any of it. i can just sit and hope that the people who i have hurt can find it in their heart to forgive my transgressions. i was a different person a year ago, and i truly am sorry for everything that i did wrong. even the current me would not want to be friends with the me a year ago.

now is going to be the beginning of.... life. a life in which i would have to choose my own path to go down. i want to make this life my own. all the big decisions are scaring me. whenever i look toward the future, all i see is an insurmountable obstacle. this might be so, but everyone has to tackle this obstacle. it will make me the person i am going to be. all that i have gone through up till now has been to prepare me for what is to come next. i cannot afford to let down the people who have stood by my side all this while.

i just want to thank my friends, for just being my friends. even the "hi and bye" friends. this might have been said a million times over, but i shall say it again.

I LOVE YOU ALL.